Day 2: pat on the back for not slumping this off

It has been a long day.  Last night, I had an incredibly hard time getting to sleep.  I don't when when I finally calmed my mind down enough but I think it was in the wee hours of the morning.  I was groggy this AM and I had to work a split today to cover opening the library and Storytime.
Storytime was fun.  It always is.  I had about 20 kids and their parents and one mom said that this was the first time that the kids engaged in Storytime.
I started the Storytime with the Fox and had everyone give him a pet and/or a hug.  I also showed them the photo of him advertising Storytime.  He looks like he is asleep.  So I mentioned that to the kids.

Storytime photo.  Mr. Fox is sleeping

After the warm up puppet I put on the Storytime Apron. In one of the pockets I put Ratty Raton Esquire III with his pack filled with all kinds of things.  I took them out one by one and he commented on the items--cheese in the event he gets hungry, a soccer ball and his trip to Brazil, pen paper and eraser because he is writing his book and a little girl mouse--his girlfriend.   I then told the Bark George story.  I read, The Pigeon Wants to Drive the Bus, and What Color is Your Underwear.  There was one more pop up book.  I couldn't find the bean bag CD but I did find a scarf CD so I had them do the scarf song.  At the end of Storytime, I picked up Fox who was laying on the seat beside me and said "You fell asleep again.  Oh, Mr. Fox what are we going to do about you?"
Afterwards, I took a long lunch and returned at 3:00 for the evening shift.  This evening I worked on my voting list for the 2015 book club.  I try to have about 25-30 selections so I am almost half way there.
When I got home, I thought I might just skip tonight but then decided that it is best for me to journal and reach my goal.  By giving up my goal this early in the game, I am setting myself up for failure.  So here I am feeling pretty good about myself.  Yeah Me!!

OK So The Year Is More Than Half Gone

Climbing 4,380 vertical feet over 9.5 miles, I am about to face the challenge of coming back up

Sometimes it is hard to be awesome.  And sometimes I forget that I want to be awesome.  Being awesome is hard work.  It takes diligence, thought and planning.  It seems that I find myself coming up short in all three of these departments lately.  I get an idea and then quickly abandon it for the path of least resistance. But I am going to give this idea a go.  There is a thought that if you journal for 28 days and if you think of positive things for 28 days, then your brain begins to change.  I think I have need to change this brain o' mine a bit.  

In The Power of Habit by Charles Duhigg, he writes about willpower being a limited quantity.  If you use your willpower just to make it through the day with a modicum of success, then when you are driving home and PIZZA pops in your mind you are likely to find yourself pulling into the Little Caesar's parking lot to pick up dinner.  OK, so maybe that is more of a ME scenario than a YOU one.  I would guess this is why a lot of people, hand held high here, gain significant amounts of weight when they promote.   All these bad habits of mine are piling up, creating a prison brick by brick.  I feel pretty walled in right now.  In order to make my great escape, I need to break the habits and dismantle this prison brick by brick. 

A long time ago, a friend would meet me in the bar every week in Japan and discuss the impending end of her contract and that she just needed to find a plan to get her apartment in order for move out.  On the day of move out, her two good friends and I ended up rushing the clock, alternating running outside to get fresh air to help her get her checked out of the apartment in time.  At the time I didn't understand, but it seems that my body and mind my mind, are the metaphysical embodiment of her apartment.  I find myself, if I could make a plan, then I would have a straw to grasp hold of and I would be able to pull myself out of this quagmire. When you are overwhelmed, it is difficult to find the energy to create that plan and even if a glimmer of one is made then to stick with it.  Energy begets energy.  Willpower begets willpower, but if you have such a low supply of either one, then it is hard to procreate.   

There are so many good things about being me.  I am strong.  I have a fantastic sense of humor.  When I have a goal that I can believe in, I can achieve it.  I have completed marathons. I hiked the Grand Canyon on a whim.  I have incredible mental fortitude.  My physical resources are none to shabby either. I need to tap into those positives and build upon them.  

For the next 28 days, I will log in give myself positive feedback.